【2022-05-12】家庭是最重要的教育场所([May 12, 2022] family is the most important place for education)

18:00

“工作”与“爱”能征服一切。
                                                                                                  ——维吉尔

“工作”与“爱”能征服一切。

                                                                                                  ——维吉尔

早上回来公司,一个共事了十一年的老同事问起了我家孩子读书的问题,因为他们家孩子跟我们家女儿一样,有身心上的缺陷。我们彼此都知道双方家庭的不容易,也比较敏感,不好经常聊这些事,毕竟都不是什么值得挂在嘴上的事情。

可能他们家的孩子已经达到了义务教育的年龄,想了解一下读书的情况,我也很坦白地跟他说,我至今一直都没有让我家孩子上学,因为她的情况不允许,不想为了让她上学而上学。讲到这里,他跟以前一样,默默流下眼泪了。他是在担心孩子不读书就没有自力更生的能力,他在担心孩子以后的社交能力,他在担心孩子的自理能力。是的,他在担心我已经担心了成千上万遍的事情。

说真的,现在还有奶奶独自一人全身心地带我女儿,无论论去哪里,做什么,奶奶都能一人很好地处理。但如果二宝出来之后呢,怎么办?我知道绝对不可能再像现在这样带大宝了,至于怎么办,谁天天送她上课,我真没想好,但我从来不曾太担心了,因边我们已经接受了孩子有缺陷的事实,而且也做好了以家庭教育为主的学习方式,以她学会自理为基本目标。所以,我不会为了让她上学而上学,达不到,硬送她去未必有助了她的成长,关于自理能力的学习,只要有家人在身边,她就能学,也就没什么好担心了。

让我们不担心的一个最重要原因是,自从大宝跟我们一起生活以后,一直在进步,也看到了我们基本教育目标的希望。就这样生活,我觉得跟普通家庭没什么不一样,也不会因为自己孩子的情况而自卑,我甚至觉得我们家大宝比任何孩子都幸福。

从刚开始知道同事家情况看,我们家孩子可能比他儿子更加严重,跟他这么一说,感觉他好像释怀了。

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18:00

“Work” and “love” can conquer everything.
– Virgil

“Work” and “love” can conquer everything.

– Virgil

When I came back to the company in the morning, an old colleague who had worked together for 11 years asked about my children’s reading, because their children, like our daughter, had physical and mental defects. We all know that the of our families is not easy and sensitive. It’s not easy to talk about these things often. After all, it’s not worth talking about.

Maybe their children have reached the age of compulsory education. I want to know about reading. I also frankly told him that I haven’t let my children go to school so far, because her situation doesn’t allow it. I don’t want to go to school in order to let her go to school. At this point, as before, he quietly shed tears. He is worried that children will not be able to rely on themselves without reading. He is worried about children’s social ability in the future. He is worried about children’s self-care ability. Yes, he’s worried. I’ve worried about things thousands of times.

To be honest, now grandma is alone with my daughter. No matter where she goes or what she does, grandma can handle it well alone. But what if Er Bao comes out? I know it’s absolutely impossible to bring Dabao like this. As for what to do, I really didn’t think about who sent her to class every day, but I never worried too much, because we have accepted the fact that the child has defects, and we have also done a good job in the learning method based on family education, with her basic goal of learning to take care of herself. Therefore, I will not go to school in order to let her go to school. If I can’t reach it, sending her to school may not help her growth. As long as there is a family around, she can learn about self-care ability, and there’s nothing to worry about.

One of the most important reasons why we don’t worry is that since Dabao lived with us, he has been making progress and has seen the hope of our basic education goals. Living in this way, I feel no different from ordinary families, and I will not feel inferior because of the situation of my children. I even think our family treasure is happier than any child.

Judging from the situation of his colleague’s family at the beginning, our child may be more serious than his son. It seems that he is relieved to tell him so.